Gardening was never ever going to be a hobby I researched or talked about or tried or pretended to know existed. Plants and I have a life long disagreement. They die in the places I want them to grow and grow in the places I want them to die.
I've been begging my husband for years to let me salt the earth around the house. He'll give in. In the meantime routine cleaning and reorganizing of the house found this:
It was a gift to me several years ago in one of those "who can buy the weirdest thing" wars. She knows I don't do plant, but she also knows I adore creepy. The whole kit and terrarium sat around the house mostly because I have to grow these plants from seeds.
SEEDS? Are you kidding me? If they grow at all they will be stunted and diseased just from my having tried. Just to prove it, I took it all out of the box and put the thing together.
All these parts:
Dirt and directions and potential living things with little plastic skulls and spiders to decorate the dirt with. I can't believe I'm actually doing this. This will never work.
The plants are moonflower which the directions say can grow 8 - 10 feet tall. Not in that little box but sure whatever. It blooms in the morning and I can eat the leaves and flowers. The cats will be so happy.
Then "sensitive plant" which shies away from you when touched or cold or dark. It takes over an hour to open up again.
Dracena, which from what I can tell only has "funny lookin" as it's description. "Ghostly white and covered in a strange white powder". A lot of people in town look like that actually.
Black Dragon which is black and red in color.
Last but not least, Aloe. Which is um...goth? WHAT? How completely random. Also the green thumbs I know can't keep Aloe alive. If it grows I'll be sure to kill it.
In any case I followed the directions and put dirt water and seeds in the little box, applied my decals and closed the box. Now I wait.
The good news is I only have to water it every 4 - 6 weeks. I might not kill it by terminal flightiness. Well, I still might.
